Ambition is essential to success, right? Although many of us have heard that we lack ambition or need to be more ambitious, there’s more to the story than it seems. Ambition means that we want to achieve, not for the sake of the achievement itself, but to set ourselves apart from others. If that’s true, then is ambition always good, and how do you find it when it’s lost?
There are multiple schools of thought on ambition and whether or not it’s a vital part of our success as humans. Whatever school you fall into, though, one thought remains steadfast: the general population feels that ambition is a good thing, especially in a capitalist nation.
What is Ambition?
There are many different variations and definitions of ambition. The dictionary definition is either “the ardent desire for rank, fame, or power” or “the desire to achieve a particular end.” Both of these definitions make sense with our earlier description of ambition meaning that we want to set ourselves apart via our achievements.
Another variation is the thought that ambition is our desire to make others think the way that we think. That means that whether we love or hate it, we want everyone else to feel the same way that we do about the subject.
Others believe that it is a desire and determination to achieve success regardless of what that success is or how it affects us. People who see ambition this way often feel that it is a vital part of our lives. If we don’t have ambition, by this definition, we will never achieve anything at all.
Some people believe that ambitiousness is a trait, and therefore we cannot alter it within ourselves. Others believe that ambition is something we can change and grow with focus and determination. Yet another view is that ambition and happiness are negatively correlated and that our age may affect how ambitious we are.
Clearly, ambition is not incredibly well defined or understood.
For our purposes, we’ll view ambition as something we can change and adjust as necessary. We will define it as a desire for success, regardless of what that success may be. We will also view it as something that only we can see our successes and failures in, not something an outsider can define or see for us.
Is Ambition Good or Bad?
By our definition, it seems that ambition is inherently good. However, some people feel that ambitiousness is a negative thing because it can cause us to see our goals and desires as more important than the people around us.
Ambition, by some definitions, is something that we use to get to gain the success that sets us apart, and therefore we are willing to do whatever it takes to get there. This kind of ambition is what you see when someone lies or exaggerates to get a promotion or a new job. It’s the kind of ambition that may result in an athlete sabotaging another to win an event as well.
Although we aren’t thinking about ambition in this way, there is some merit to these thoughts. We don’t want our ambitions to come at the price of our morality or ethics. We want our ambitions to help us to succeed, but to do so justly and concerning other people’s feelings and desires as well.
If we focus on ways that we can succeed with someone else or that we can all succeed in at least some way, then we will be more likely to find happiness in our successes. We will also find help to continue being ambitious if we focus on others too.
If you want to know how to overcome a lack of ambition, one of the simplest ways is to have a team behind you to keep you motivated. You can’t have a team if you’re constantly stepping on others to get to where you’re going.
So, overall, ambition is a good thing, but it can turn into a negative if you’re focusing on the wrong things or losing your ethics along the way.
How Do I Begin the Journey to Ambitiousness?
Learning how to overcome a lack of ambition is a process. It’s important to understand that even super successful folks will go through periods when they experience failures, or they doubt themselves. You will inevitably experience this, and it doesn’t mean that you lack ambition or you’re lazy, or you’re not good enough. It’s just the way life cycles, and it’s okay.
Overcoming the down times in your life is what ambition is all about. There are lots of things you can do to help you get through your struggles and find your ambition again. We’ll talk about many of them as we go along, but here is a sneak peek for you:
- Find a mentor
- Get and stay active
- Build a support system
- Learn about yourself
- See a need, fill a need
- Focus on your triumphs
- Create a to-do list
- Find your passion
There are several approaches to many of these tactics, and we’ll discuss each in-depth as we go. Understanding that you can impact your life and only you can decide when you succeed is key to getting started. You can only overcome a lack of ambition if you are willing to see things objectively.
Find a Mentor
There are plenty of studies out there that show the positive impact mentoring relationships have on both the mentor and the mentee. Having someone with whom to share your knowledge or somewhat who can guide you along your path, likely having already walked it themselves, is vital for success.
It doesn’t seem to matter what your goals are; mentoring makes a difference. If your passion is child-rearing, then find a mom who you can look up to and seek advice from as you begin your journey. If your passion is space travel, then maybe you can find a pen pal at NASA. You could even start smaller and talk to Air Force members or astrophysicists or aerospace engineers.
Regardless of where your ambition leads you, having a mentor to look up to and to seek advice from can be incredibly motivating. Mentoring relationships are a key piece of success, no matter how you define it.
Get and Stay Active
It may not be a shock to you that physical activity and laziness are negatively correlated. That means that as you become more physically active, you also become less lazy in other parts of your life. You begin to want to achieve success professionally, in your family or friend groups, and with your hobbies.
Most successful people exercise or get active in some way every day. There are several benefits to being physically active. Those benefits include the following:
- Brain building
- Positive feelings from meeting goals
- Better scheduling and time management skills
- Increased competitiveness (with yourself, not others)
On top of these positive impacts, working out and getting active can also help you to look better. Although we don’t like to admit it, our looks do make a difference in our personal and professional successes, so meeting fitness goals may make us more likely to succeed.
Looking better may also help you feel better about yourself, thereby increasing your confidence and your likelihood to succeed.
Build a Better Support System
So you’ve got your mentor, but what about the rest of your support system? Are you surrounded by people who are motivated and looking for success, or are you constantly seeing your friends, family, and colleagues fail or not try? Surrounding yourself with ambitious people is an impactful way to make sure you remain ambitious as well.
You’ve probably heard that you tend to become like the five people you spend the most time with, and that means that spending time with successful and ambitious people will likely result in your being more ambitious and successful. If you surround yourself with people who lack ambition, then you’re unlikely to keep it up yourself.
Learn About Yourself
Ambition without direction isn’t a good thing. It can lead to missteps and missed opportunities, and those can lead to failures that ultimately challenge your ambition. If you want to be an ambitious person, then you’ll need to learn about yourself and your passions. Find your natural gifts through aptitude tests and talking with those who know you well.
When you give yourself time to learn about what makes you tick, then you’ll find out about what things you’re already motivated to do. You can use those intrinsic motivations to help keep yourself motivated.
For example, if you’re naturally passionate about animals and love spending time with them, then maybe you can focus your attention on becoming a veterinarian. You could also spend time advocating for animals in a shelter environment or even learning to train animals in some way. Each of these goals can make you feel ambitious and help you to overcome your lack thereof.
Find and Fill a Need
Once you’ve found the general area that you’re passionate about, you’ll want to figure out your goals regarding that area. One of the best ways to find a goal is to find a need.
If we continue with the animal example from above, what is a need you see for animals in your area? Does your county not have a shelter? Are there a large number of feral cats in the area that could use shelters or barns in which to exist? If you can find a need, then you can set small goals to help you fill that need overtime, and that can lead to ambition.
Focus on Triumphs, Not Failures
Studies show that focusing on positive pieces of your day will help you to succeed. Not only that, but you will find yourself being more optimistic and thinking more creatively the more you participate in daily exercises that focus your thoughts on the positive.
When you think about your triumphs, then you’re also more likely to see how you achieved them. When we think about our failures, we tend to set ourselves into a pattern of failure or see ourselves in a poor light. How you see yourself makes a huge difference in your ability to find ambition and ultimately succeed in meeting your goals.
Create a To-Do List
Being ambitious means that you have to have goals, but how do you achieve those goals and keep your ambition high? Step one is to create a to-do list. Having a list of all of your goals, however small or large, can help you to see your successes. I can also show you how far you’ve come toward your goals.
You should be careful to keep a positive mindset when creating your to-do list. If you don’t, then you risk falling into the “it’s too hard” trap. This trap is an easy one to get caught in because it results from seeing how far you still have to go instead of focusing on how far you’ve come. To-do lists can show you both, and that’s not always a good thing.
You may want to save your to-do list until you’ve found something you’re passionate enough about to keep your ambitions high. You may also want to enlist the help of your mentor or support group to create the list in the first place so that you can tell where to start, which may help you to avoid feeling overwhelmed by the list.
Find Your Passion
Where ambition can fail you, passion can help you push through. Passion is fundamentally different from ambition, but they are both important if you want to succeed in life. Passion has a positive connotation because it’s about moving past struggles and continuing despite the odds. Ambition would almost certainly not exist if it weren’t for passion.
To make yourself ambitious, you’ll want to find your passion. If you’re passionate about a topic, then you’re more likely to remain ambitious as you hit roadblocks on your way to success. Someone who is passionate about writing, for instance, likely won’t give up just because a publisher turned down their book proposal. Without passion, your ambition may waver.
Leave Your Comfort Zone
Your comfort zone is just that: comfortable. It’s a place where your routines and activities fit a pattern that can help to reduce the stress in your life and make you feel safe. Unfortunately, the comfort zone is almost always a place where passions and dreams die. Staying within your comfort zone stagnates growth because it doesn’t leave room for new information or ideas.
Leaping too far outside of your comfort zone isn’t a great thing either. If we jump way out of our comfort zone, then we are more likely to quit before we achieve our goals. We are also less likely to relate to the people around us. To achieve the maximum bang for our buck, we need to achieve what researchers call optimal anxiety.
If you can bring yourself into optimal anxiety, which means you’re just a bit outside your comfort zone, but not too far, then you’ll be able to achieve maximum productivity. You will also find that you can jump out of your comfort zone with much less effort in the future. Creativity is at its best in optimal anxiety states, which is a great place to find new passions and ambitions.
Do Your Research
Ambition means having goals but also understanding how to get there. If you don’t know enough about how to achieve your goals, then how will you ever do so? We aren’t just talking about researching your goals, though. We are also talking about thinking things through before making a move that could lead to failure or a major misstep.
If you want to be an actor, then most people would probably tell you to move to New York or L.A. Unfortunately, if you’re a college drop out without a job, that is a pretty unattainable goal. You’ll want to research how to get a job in one of those areas before you move, or how to start acting in your local environment so that you have some experience before you go.
Without research, you’ll likely find yourself failing again and again, and that can spell death to your ambition. Understanding the steps to get where you need to go, finding out about the best parts of the world to succeed, and researching others who have succeeded in similar goals is an essential part of keeping ambition alive.
Do Not Fear Failure
Failure is inevitable. Failure isn’t a bad thing, as many people think, though. Nelson Mandela once said, “I never fail. I either win, or I learn.” This kind of thinking can help you to overcome the adversity that is sure to arise as you attempt to achieve the goals associated with your ambitions.
Fear of failure can freeze you. It can take over your mind and make you feel like you cannot achieve your goals. It can stop you from believing in yourself. All of the things that a fear of failure can do will stop you from achieving your ambitions. It can slow your ambition and create a situation in which you wind up back where you started.
Instead of fearing failure, embrace it. Understand that small failures happen and that they are a part of what can help you to learn as you move toward your goals. It’s okay to fail as long as you keep your focus on the positive and understand how to fix mistakes in the future.
The Nature of Ambition
It’s widely believed that ambition is a part of human nature. Not just human nature, actually, but animal nature too. Starting from their first few days of life, wolves begin to sort themselves into levels from alpha to beta and beyond. Alphas seem to have more ambition than the rest of the pack, taking what they need and want more readily than the others. The same is true of people.
Researchers tend to believe that there is both nature and nurture involved in ambition. In general, some children are ambitious from day one, and some are not, but scientists have found that the right motivation can get even the least ambitious people moving. That’s good news if you’ve found that you’ve been overall unambitious throughout your life.
Gender and Ambition
Another piece of the nature-puzzle is gender. Studies regularly suggest that women and men are different in how they pursue ambitions, but not necessarily in how ambitious they are overall. Women tend to compete against themselves or drive toward goals with others in mind, where men thrive on competition with others.
If a woman, then, feel she needs to learn how to overcome lack of ambition, she might want to focus on the aspects of the process like building a support group and getting a mentor. A man, however, might do better focusing on finding a passion, filling a need before someone else can, or even focusing on his past successes.
Although the above scenarios for men versus women’s motivations aren’t foolproof for all, it might be a good place to start if you’re struggling.
How Your Family Affects Your Ambition
Although most psychologists agree that there’s no real biological difference in which families will turn out more successful or ambitious kids, they do believe that there is a parenting strategy that promotes ambition.
Parents who focus on their children’s successes, don’t overreact to failures and set tough challenges that are still realistically achievable to tend to turn out the most ambitious kids. Parents who focus on their children’s failures or set up unrealistic challenges for their kids to complete tend to set them up for lack of ambition as adults.
One thing that is vital to understand is there doesn’t seem to be a link between privilege and ambition aside from educational differences. Although some scientists argue that lower-income families see ambition as a luxury and upper-class families see it as unnecessary, leaving the upper middle class the most likely to have high ambitions as a rule.
Growing up wealthy can either help you to understand the tools you need to succeed or create an atmosphere in which you can skate through life. Growing up poor can either mean you find the drive to move up, or you rehash the lifestyle you grew up with and remain where you started. It seems to be up to the parents and genetics to decide which way we go.
Understanding the Nature of Ambition
Ambition is something that we tend to see as a good thing but used improperly; it can be unpleasant at best. It is good to have goals and passions, but the way you approach meeting those goals is essential. You want to keep your morals and ethics in reach while you strive to be and do your best. Otherwise, you may find yourself alone with your successes.
There are lots of ways to overcome a lack of ambition and plenty of reasons why you might not be ambitious in the first place. Maybe you failed big and are worried about doing it again. Maybe you are suffering from depression or anxiety and need some professional help to get you motivated. Maybe you were simply born with less ambition than others.
To overcome any of the obstacles above, you’ll need to know what you want. Ambition without direction is useless. Once you find your passion or feel you’ve discovered your purpose, then you can research how best to achieve your goals. You can make new friends who are ambitious as well, enlist the help of a mentor, and start a to-do list to help you get the job done.
In Conclusion
Understanding the nature of ambition, why you stopped being ambitious, and what to do to overcome your lack of ambition are all vital to living your best life. Make sure that you focus on the positive and learn to stop fearing failure as well. Just those two simple acts can be the difference between achieving your dreams and watching them flutter by from your couch.
Overcoming your lack of ambition might be a long road, especially if you are trying to do so without the jolt of motivation that comes along as you get excited about a new adventure or idea, but it’s worth it. Ambition can help you to move up in the world, to feel happy and prosperous, and to make more friends or build stronger relationships at home.
You don’t have to have ambition in a professional setting. You can be ambitious at home as well. Many people find that becoming a parent makes their ambition rise to the surface again or for the first time, for instance. It’s all about you, and if you follow at least a few of our steps, then we know that you’ll be able to get where you want to be.